When I had Kyra, I found myself doing much of the same (the gazing), however I also quickly became overwhelmed by the responsibility of being a new mother. I was overcome by the lack of sleep. And at times even longed for the way life was before baby. When I had Katie, I had some idea of the responsibility and fatigue it took to be a parent. I found myself often thinking I wasn't the best at being a mom of babies. Don't get me wrong, I love both the girls (and have from the very beginning). But that really young baby stage just isn't my cup of tea. I tend to like it when they are a little bit older. I like it when they sleep through the night, laugh continuously to the silliest little thing, are beginning to show more personality, and give you a better indicator of why in tarnation they are crying. I'm just too nervous.
So, before I had Andrew, I found myself giving myself little pep talks. Now, Sarah, you only have to get through the next few months and then life will get better. Now , Sarah, you can handle sleepless nights for a short while, it really isn't that long in the whole scheme of life! Now, Sarah, just keep on your hubby to give you lots of help and you'll make it through this stage. But to tell you the truth, I haven't really needed those pep talks thus far. I know it's probably a little premature (seeing as though I have only had a few days at home with him, and I've also had my SUPER mother here to help me with the girls) to be saying things have been going well, but they have. And I'm finding that I really love this baby stage. In fact I have found myself wishing at times that I could freeze time and hold on to this little baby body for longer than I know I have time with him before he starts to grow. He is just really that precious. He has the cutest little smile already, long little toes and fingers, and the best little shaped head. I am simply joyful that God has blessed me with such a beautiful little boy.
So, I guess for now I'll just try and capture some of these moments in pictures and hold on to the snuggling time we have for now, because I know it won't be long and these time will be over in a flash. Even my mom said, "you could keep on having children to try and recapture this stage of life, but they are always going to grow up."